Elven Escapades
by Ladya C. Maxine
Summary: Just how much trouble can four young elflings get into at the Last Homely House?
1. chapter one

Title: Elven Escapades  
  
Authoress: Ladya C. Maxine  
  
Rating: PG  
  
Summary: Just how much trouble can four elflings get into?   
  
A series of events during Legolas and his friends' childhood while staying in Rivendell. Characters: Legolas, Elladan, Elrohir, Arwen, Elrond, Thranduil, Glordfindel, Erestor, Celeborn, Galadriel, Haldir.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own LotR or any of her characters. All unrecognizable characters belong solely to me so do not touch. I am not making any money off of this and write only to amuse.  
  
A/N: see my bio-page for other updates.  
  
************  
  
"Should we ask?" Glorfindel asked lazily, lolling his head to one side to regard Elrond.  
  
"I don't even want to know."  
  
The two elders were in lazy conversation, sitting in the lounge and sipping their hot tea, their breakfast plates having been taken away by the servants not too long ago. It was Glorfindel who had caught the movement out of the corner of his eye just in time to see the two little dark-haired heads sneaking quietly down the hall.  
  
"The last time you said that we ended up peeling Erestor off the wall and his phoebia of snakes is worse than ever."   
  
"You leaning against the wall laughing with tears in your eyes didn't help the situation."   
  
"Oh, don't start that again...But you must admit, he shrieks like a maiden."  
  
Elrond chuckled and nodded despite himself. Running into a room to find his normally aloof advisor standing on a chair holding his robes above his ankles while screaming in a pitched voice that not even six year old Arwen could top was a moment he would forever hold dear.   
  
"And besides, they aren't heading towards Erestor's rooms."   
  
"Who aren't heading towards Erestor's rooms?" Thranduil stepped into the room, dressed in full riding attire. The Wood-elf was extremely fond of riding at the most ungodly hours of dawn.  
  
"My sons." Elrond moved over to allow his friend space to sink onto the long couch. "I fear they are on the prowl again."  
  
Thranduil stiffened and his eyes narrowed.  
  
"Were they, by any chance, carrying a large bucket?"  
  
That was bad.   
  
Elrond and Glorfindel exchanged worried looks.   
  
"Now that you mention it, they did indeed seem to be dragging something between them." Glorfindel craned his neck to look over the couch but the corridor where young Elladan and Elrohir had been in was now empty.   
  
Elrond sat up straighter. His sons plus a bucket equaled something extremely unpleasant. Perhaps this was how Glorfindel had felt when he had faced off with that balrog; complete and utter fear.   
  
"Please tell me they were merely collecting stones."  
  
Beside him Glorfindel snorted. "Oh, *that* would be very reassuring. Have you forgotten about that priceless vase you've had since the First Age?"  
  
How could he forget the shattered pieces that had greeted him upon entering his office?  
  
Thranduil wasn't fully listening to them, his eyes searching the corridors.   
  
"It was but a glimpse. I was riding out the gates when I just barely saw them behind a brush. They were too absorbed in whatever they were doing though they were on hands and knees, apperently looking for something. I would have stopped but Hersail has finally recuparated and I didn't want to bring something upon her again."   
  
It had taken several weeks to remove the blue ink which had been smeared over his mare's fine white coat in sloppy paterns, the culprits' similar little handprints clearly visible.  
  
"I suggest we go find them," Elrond sighed and stood. He frowned when neither blond rose from where they were sitting; Glorfindel actually seemed to sink deeper into the cushions.  
  
"If all three of us go it will alert them. You go ahead and we will assist should you yell."   
  
The half-elven raised a brow at the elder of the two blonds, then turned to Thranduil who was suddenly intent on checking the bindings at the end of his long ponytail.   
  
"And your excuse, Elven king?"   
  
"Not my son."   
  
'Fair enough,' Elrond thought bitterly. He knew not what Legolas was up to but Thranduil would indeed need all his strength to cope with what his only child would come up with today.  
  
"Then I suppose--"  
  
"AAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIII!!!!!!!"  
  
The sound would have made a dog howl as it tore through the Last Homely House. The three friends were forced to cover their sensitive ears though Elrond swore he felt his ear drum already burst.   
  
"GET IT OFF ME!! GET IT OFF!!"  
  
If seeing Erestor standing on a chair was amusing, seeing Lothlorien's snobby and collected march warden run into the room in only a bath towel while frantically shaking his head was down right hysterical! He was still soaked from his bath and his hair was soppy with foam as he must have been washing it. Water sprayed everywhere as the long strands whipped from left to right.  
  
"GET IT OUT!!"  
  
By now the three elven lords had recovered, Glorfindel infact now suffering from hysterics. Elrond walked over, taking a hold of Haldir's slippery shoulders.  
  
"At ease, marchwarden! What's wrong?"  
  
Haldir merely whimpered and motioned frantically at his hair. Elrond himself started and jumped back when his eyes fell upon an enormous insect which had gotten itself efficiently tangled in the silver strands. The six legs, each twice the size of his index finger, scrambled madly, ensnaring the huge bug even more.  
  
Thranduil and Glorfindel, who after having seen the bug had ceased giggling, stared with open mouth shock. Thranduil unconsciously ran his hand over his golden hair as if assuring himself that there was nothing in it. Slowly, both rose to their feet and tentatively walked over to where Elrond had regained himself.  
  
"What the...?"  
  
"Get it out," Haldir whispered pleadingly, his body trembling. He hunted orcs and wargs with glee; disgusting insects that clung to one's person was a *whole* other thing.   
  
"Eeeeewww!!"  
  
A small dark head came bobbing towards them as little Arwen skipped into the room, her dress surprisingly clean. Her nose wrinkled.  
  
"Haldir, your hairclip is icky!"   
  
"Thank you for your observation, Arwen," Elrond sighed as he gingerly started to remove the insect. He wasn't overly fond of six-legged pests but when one had twin sons one encountered them on a daily basis, mainly in one's bed or one's robes, and one got used to it, though this particular speciment was highly distasteful.   
  
"Glorfindel, go to my healing chamber and bring me a scapel. I fear we are going to have to cut it out." He felt a twinge of sympathy when Haldir made a small sound of dismay at that; the marchwarden cherished his hair. "Thranduil, and I know that they are not yours, but find the twins and bring them to their room until I am finished."  
  
Thranduil groaned, however, the marchwarden's words froze them in their tracks.  
  
"It wasn't the twins. It was Prince Legolas."  
  
"Legolas?" Thranduil wasn't surprised to say the least, his son was as great a prankster and tormentor as Elrond's, but he had though him to be training his archery in the fields.  
  
"Aye, your majesty. He snuck up on me while I was dozing in the bath and dropped this...thing...on my head. I recognize the...child's....giggles anywhere." Haldir looked very tempted to call the princeling something different but it would be folly to do so in the elfling's father's presence.  
  
Elrond shook his head in mock disappointment.  
  
"Really Thranduil, I thought you had a better control over your child." Chuckling, he started to lead Haldir, and his unwanted companion, which was hissing louder than ever, towards his healing chamber. To both him and the Elven king's surprise, Glorfindel was the voice of reason as he spoke up.  
  
"But if Legolas dropped the beetle on Haldir...what do Elladan and Elrohir have in the bucket?"  
  
"Icky snake!" Arwen chirped helpfully from where she sat on the couch, leaning against the backrest with her chin resting on folded arms. "All black and wriggly!"  
  
"A snake? Why..."   
  
All three lords exchanged tired looks.   
  
By Valar, not again...  
  
"YAAAAAAAIIII!!!!!"  
  
Thranduil turned to Glorfindel with a small smirk.   
  
"You're right; Erestor *does* shriek like a maiden."  
  
tbc..........  
  
***********  
  
The insect was a Weta. I was watching the Fellowship of the Ring DVD's special features and in it they mentioned (can't really remember why) the Weta. Its the world's heaviest insect and lives in New Zealand. It is kinda like an enormous, fat cricket with long atteneas. Really gross! I don't know if they actually hiss, though I doubt it, but since this is a Middle-earth bug it must be pretty freaky.  
  
The whole story is probably going to be like this; elflings terrorizing Rivendell, parents getting major headaches, Glorfindel endlessly taunting Erestor, ect.ect.ect.  
  
This chapter was focussed on the adults but the rest will also have the children's p.o.v.  
  
Read & Review, please. 


	2. chapter two

Title: Elven Escapades  
  
Authoress: Ladya C. Maxine  
  
Rating: G  
  
Summary: see chapter one.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Lord of the Rings or any of its characters. Any and all unrecognizable characters belong solely to me and are not to be touched. I am not making any money off of this and I write with the sole intention to entertain.

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"Ada?"   
  
"Yes, Arwen?"  
  
"Did the maids clean my room?"   
  
Not pausing in his writing, he nodded.  
  
"Aye."  
  
"Did they go in my closet?"  
  
"Your gowns are being cleaned, so I suppose so."  
  
"Did they find...something?"  
  
Catching on to an unnerving realization, he stopped writing and looked sceptically over at the small elfling who watched him with too wide, too innocent eyes.  
  
"Something?"  
  
"Something."  
  
"Something like what?"  
  
"Just…something. They didn't say anything?"  
  
"They didn't. However," he fixed her with a serious look, "I would like to know what it is the maids should have found."  
  
"It's not my fault! Elrohir and Elladan couldn't keep them in their room!"  
  
"Them?"  
  
"...so Elrohir asked if I could keep the buckets in my closets…"  
  
"Buckets?"  
  
"But I guess they escaped..."   
  
She frowned softly but then simply shrugged and skipped out, leaving Elrond massaging his suddenly aching temple.  
  
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"No you can't!"  
  
"Yes, I can!"  
  
"Nuh-uh!"  
  
"Uh-huh!"  
  
"Nuh-uh!"  
  
"Uh-huh!"  
  
Elrohir watched back and forth as his brother and their blond friend argued from where he laid comfortably on the grass.  
  
"What are you doing?" Arwen asked, appearing out of nowhere and crouching down next to the younger twin.  
  
"Legolas says he can hit anything with his arrows. Elladan says he can't," the elfling shrugged, fighting the urge to yawn. It was so boring! It was almost noon and they had only played six pranks so far!  
  
"Fine then! Let's see how good you are. Let's see you...um..." Elladan looked around them, "Let's see you...hit that!"  
  
They all looked up to see the lonely apple hanging from a branch above their heads. It was pretty high but Legolas squared his shoulders.  
  
"Easy."  
  
Giving him a sceptical look, Elladan stepped back to allow him room. Elrohir and Arwen came to stand next to him, the three peredhils watching curiously to see if their woodland friend could actually hit that.   
  
Before they could even doubt it the arrow was pulled and launched and with a solid thud it connected with the apple, ripping it off the branch and continuing on. It finally reached its limit and with a large arch it plummeted back down to earth, disappearing behind the shrubs that surrounded a terrace.   
  
A thump followed by a pained "Ai!" followed so exchanging quick glances the four elflings scampered off, disappearing beneath the foliage.

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"An apple?"   
  
"Aye, my lord. It fell from the sky! With an arrow! It is a miracle I am still standing!"  
  
Elrond glanced over at Thranduil who shook his head helplessly. Sighing, he turned back to the servant who had his hand protectively held over a rather large lump on his once smooth brow. Judging from the injury it hadn't been a real arrow, else the Elf would have been dead, and there was only one sort of arrow that came to both lords' minds.  
  
"Is it truly necessary that Legolas learns archery?" Elrond asked after he had led the still shaken Elf to the infirmary.   
  
"At least the arrows are stumps. And I fear he must; Mirkwood in dangerous."  
  
"More so than here?" They both looked over at the bruised servant before sighing simultaneously.  
  
"At least he doesn't know of the powdered arrows yet. If ever he got his hands on one of those..."  
  
Elrond shuddered at the thought.

---------------------------------

"Are you sure your ada gave you that?" Arwen asked, eyeing the rather scary looking arrow the blond held in his hand.  
  
"Well, I found it just lying around...in his closet, on the highest shelf, wrapped in chain mail in a trunk with lock and key... but if he didn't want me to find it I'm sure he would have hidden it from me."  
  
That did make sense so she nodded, though wasn't so sure about it. Looking up, she shielded her eyes from the sun, squinting at the blonde's new target. This one looked a bit more difficult than the others.  
  
On the third floor of the grand house, facing the east, a large terrace ran alongside the outer wall. An opened doorway rose majestically over it, its archway one of the most detailed and lovely piece of work and it lead to one of her ada's most favourite places in the house; his library. Many days he would sit in the doorway, enjoying the cool breeze provided by a nearby waterfall as he read.   
  
He wasn't there now but the doorway had another occupant.   
  
Hanging by an invisible thread, swaying softly in the breeze, was a spider.  
  
Spiders, big or small, were not at all liked in Middle-earth. It was very rare to see a spider in Rivendell but when they were found they were quickly eliminated. So it went without saying that the elflings felt very lucky to have come across one for themselves. It wasn't as big as the monsters the great warriors slay in Legolas' realm, in fact it was just a bit bigger than the tip of their smallest finger, but it would do for four eager, little elflings.  
  
"But wouldn't ada be mad if he finds an arrow in the library?" Elrohir asked. He was a prankster but certain things he knew not to mess with, his father's library being one of them.  
  
Legolas rolled his eyes.  
  
"This isn't a normal arrow," he explained. "A very good craftsman back home made it. When it hits the enemy it makes a big sound and then disappears. I saw them use it one time on a warg. It's magical. Your Ada will never even know it happened and we'll get rid of the spider."  
  
The word 'magical' stopped all doubts and the siblings eagerly watched as he fitted the arrow, which was actually too big for his bow.  
  
Now, youngsters are known to see things differently then adults. The arrow Legolas had was by far not magical, but destructible. A new weapon of Mirkwood, brought to Rivendell to show its power, its head was covered in a powder. The sudden force of impact with the target triggers an imbalance that causes a massive explosion, which, of course, completely disintegrates the arrow as well as the target...and everything in its surrounding.  
  
This little fact was not known to Legolas so with a final tug he pulled back the arrow as far as he could, his small arm straining under its weigh. Sighting alongside the trembling shaft, he found it difficult to get a fixed lock. Finally, he felt he had it right and released the arrow.  
  
The shaft whistled through the air as it raced upwards...  
  
Sailing through the trees...  
  
Shooting over the hedges...  
  
Rocketing across the terrace...  
  
And missing the tiny spider completely.   
  
It disappeared inside, the spider swaying slightly on its thread in the aftermath.  
  
"Aw! You missed!" Arwen pouted. "Ada's going to be mad when he finds that arrow in--"  
  
Her words were cut off by a massive BOOOOOOM that shook the very ground they stood on. Crying out, they dropped to the floor, watching fearfully as a large ball of fire exploded out of the archway, almost blasting the entire wall off of the house. It took several seconds for the rumbling to fade away, leaving nothing but thick clouds of smoke. From out the smoke, hundreds of little objects fluttered to the ground.  
  
"That arrow is magic!" Elrohir gasped, "It's snowing!"  
  
"Um..." Elladan said doubtfully, catching a 'snow flake'. "This isn't snow..."   
  
Holding it up he showed them a scrap of paper, blackened around the edges, words still discernable on it. All that remained of what was once a book.  
  
Alarmed voices sounded as others were drawn to the scene.  
  
"Maybe we should go; we'll probably get in the way," Legolas offered, to which the three nodded vigorously.   
  
They turned away from the smoking building...only to run into the elf that stood behind them, arms crossed and not too pleased.  
  
"Glorfindel!" Elladan yelped.  
  
The elder's eyes scanned over the small group, relieved to see that they were at least unharmed. His gaze settled on Legolas, who was still holding his bow. The young blond quickly dropped it, faking innocence.  
  
"Let's go. Your fathers will be eager to have a word with you."  
  
Nodding, they started to follow the tall blond.   
  
A thought came to Arwen and smiling sweetly, she skipped over to the seneschal's side and pointed out;  
  
"At least we got rid of the spider!"

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Erestor patted his lord and friend sympathetically on the back as they surveyed the damage.   
  
The entire room was...black. That's the only way to describe it, other than completely destroyed. Shelves and bookcases had been reduced to charred splinters and anything remotely of a paper element was gone. Elrond sighed loudly, rubbing between his eyes.  
  
"Ai Elbereth!"  
  
Thranduil stepped into the room, gingerly stepping over a still smouldering pile of rubble.   
  
"Thranduil," Elrond began calmly, "what are the effects from the powder arrows?"  
  
The blond sighed and motioned helplessly to the chaos around them.  
  
"This basically sums it up."  
  
"And of the elfllings, which one had the most likely access to the arrows?"  
  
"I get your point," the blond rolled his eyes, unbecoming of his race. "I will pay for the damages."  
  
"Most of these ashes were once scripts from before my birth. Not even all the jewels in your hoard can replace them."  
  
Stalling, Thranduil found a new interest in the outside, which was a much more panoramic view now that the entire wall was gone.  
  
"By the Valar…"  
  
Glorfindel stepped into the room, mouth falling open and eyes widening. He hadn't expected it to be this bad.  
  
"It looks like a Balrog's den!"  
  
"My father always told my brother and me as children that we will understand his headaches when we have children of our own…yet I truly don't believe I was anything like this as a youngster."  
  
Glorfindel choked back a disbelieving laugh, turning his head as he blinked away tears. Elrond frowned at his lifelong tutor and friend but his attention was caught by four pairs of wide eyes peeking at them around the doorway.  
  
"Care to join us?" he asked with a raised brow.  
  
The eyes disappeared and the four adults could hear as the elflings debated in loud whispers amongst themselves who should go first.  
  
"Ladies first, Arwen!"  
  
"No fair! Legolas, you fired the arrow!"  
  
"Elladan made me so he should go!"  
  
"Uh-uh! Elrohir, go inside!"  
  
"I didn't do anything!"  
  
Elrond rolled his eyes, ignoring Erestor and Glorfindel's chuckles.   
  
"In here, now. All four of you at the same time."  
  
After a few seconds silence, four small elves shuffled into the room; Elladan still trying to get Elrohir to walk before them but the younger twin struggled against his older sibling's insistence. They finally came to stop before the adults.  
  
Folding his arms into his sleeves, Elrond raised a brow.  
  
"Well? What happened?"  
  
"--I didn't do anything!--"  
  
"--Arwen found the spider!--"  
  
"--Legolas took the arrow!--"  
  
"--Elladan made me!--"  
  
"--Elrohir said we should look there!--"  
  
"--Legolas missed the spider--"  
  
"--it was snowing!!--"  
  
"Silence!"  
  
They fell silent, nervously awaiting their punishments.  
  
10 minutes later, after an extensive lecture on safety, theft and "playing with fire", plus individual tasks that would take weeks to complete, the four elflings' heads hung. Their downcast faces worked their magic in the elders' hearts and they had begun to reconsider the punishment when a commotion from below brought all four adults onto the balcony to look down upon the courtyard.  
  
A dozen or so maids were running in circles over the grass, shrieking and sobbing as they frantically tugged at their dresses and shook their heads. Despite the distance and running, their sharp eyes caught sight of many small, black things which clung to the maids, some slipping down their bodices or curling in their hair.  
  
"Are those…slugs?" Glorfindel asked, wincing when two of the maids collided in their hysteria and fell to the floor. Several other elves came running to their aid, attempting to calm them down to remove the slimy creatures. Using the elders' distraction, the four elflings quickly slipped from the room, scurrying down the halls before splitting up and disappearing in the Last Homely House.  
  
Vaguely taking note of the youngsters' retreat, Glorfindel and Erestor turned and ran out to help the grieving maids, leaving the two lords to watch the spectacle in stunned silence. Elrond was the first to break it.  
  
"Thranduil?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"Tell me, what are those?" He pointed to three scattered objects on the ground amidst the shrieking maids.  
  
Leaning forward slightly on the railing, the blond shrugged as he studied them.  
  
"They look like buckets to me-- Where are you going?" he asked when his friend turned with a swirl of his long robes.  
  
"To add two more weeks of chores to Arwen and the twins' punishment," was the determined answer, all ounce of sympathy drained from the lore lord.  
  
Confused but not questioning the Lord of the Valley, Thranduil sighed and turned back to the courtyard where things had moderately settled as Glorfindel and Erestor arrived. A small tickling sensation on his hand made him look down.  
  
A small spider, no bigger than the tip of a child's smallest finger, scrambled over his hand before disappearing from view beneath the railing.  
  
Tbc……

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Read & Review, please.


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